I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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