I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Randomize