i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize