i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Randomize
