Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  How's tricks little girl?

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Trix are for kids, old man.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): How's tricks little girl? (205): Trix are for kids, old man. http://tfl.nu/bqwt
  Replies (6) Good night (834) Bad night (976)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  My cat gives me a boner

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): My cat gives me a boner http://tfl.nu/df3i
  Replies (29) Good night (764) Bad night (6942)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (772): you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted http://tfl.nu/vebg
  Replies (39) Good night (5203) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels.. http://tfl.nu/8nli
  Replies (6) Good night (2827) Bad night (817)
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (435): I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated. http://tfl.nu/6ris
  Replies (15) Good night (6094) Bad night (728)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..." http://tfl.nu/9x9f
  Replies (16) Good night (1987) Bad night (3714)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly http://tfl.nu/smco
  Replies (6) Good night (847) Bad night (3602)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it http://tfl.nu/rdxn
  Replies (19) Good night (5004) Bad night (1562)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper. http://tfl.nu/3zpi
  Replies (10) Good night (1407) Bad night (555)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back http://tfl.nu/jzby
  Replies (2) Good night (1325) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (551): View more from New Jersey

  Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (551): Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners http://tfl.nu/77j3
  Replies (4) Good night (1375) Bad night (357)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok). http://tfl.nu/yawu
  Replies (2) Good night (801) Bad night (282)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!? http://tfl.nu/rfa8
  Replies (5) Good night (732) Bad night (244)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner http://tfl.nu/zbhu
  Replies (5) Good night (809) Bad night (228)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex. http://tfl.nu/36q6
  Replies (4) Good night (1101) Bad night (167)

Randomize