...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
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Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
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No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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