ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize