I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize
