the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
