oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
