Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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