So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
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I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
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Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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