God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
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