To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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