I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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