You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I don't want my vagina anymore.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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