my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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