I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
He shit in the fireplace
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
