Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize