whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You need Xanax blowdarts
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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