that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
