We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize