wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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