i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I pour the whiskey from now on
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
