it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
