It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
are you so shy because you have an std?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
