she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I fill condoms, not promises.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
