Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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