Yo dont text me then not text me
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize