Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
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all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
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Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize