Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize