No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize