What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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