You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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