Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Randomize
