I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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