The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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