he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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