I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
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Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
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I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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