But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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