Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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