Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize