dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
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A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
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Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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