Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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