chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
