what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
