how do flat chested girls get laid?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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