Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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