He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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