she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
